Process Your Pain

Photo Credit: amanky via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: amanky via Compfight cc


We all have it from time to time. Pain. Frustration. Disappointment. Bad days.  To put it simply…Anger!

We have been taught by society and others that anger is bad.  That we should not even feel anger.  And we definitely should not express it.  However, anger is real.  Sometimes it is necessary.  Even JESUS got angry.  The problem with anger is that most of the time, we don’t express it in a healthy way.  We don’t process it in a healthy way.


What do you do with it? Do you take it out on yourself? Do you take it out on your kids? Do you take it out at your workplace? Do you drink it away? Do you take illegal substances? Do you use sex? Do you participate in risky behaviors?

It is very necessary for yourself, the health of your emotions and the people around you that you process, learn and heal from your anger. but how?

Here is one suggestion.  I learned of this method through The Embassy Institute and Bill Gothard.  This is something you do alone.  It takes 5 steps and could be just the tool to help you learn to respond in a positive, more productive way.  I have also found that I gain spiritual power when I do this.

When someone hurts you.  When you get upset.  When you are persecuted or offended.  You don’t have to get even.  You can choose to have a GREAT response.

G.R.E.A.T. response:

  1. Give thanks
  2. Rejoice (in the Lord)
  3. Engraft Christ’s commands (whatever command of Christ that fits the situation)
  4. Appeal to God (cry out to Him)
  5. Triumph with good works

It may seem weird or uncomfortable at first, but trust the process.  Stick to it.  You should see results.

Until Next Time,

Peace & Joy!



Your First Love?

Photo Credit: naama via Compfight cc

Photo Credit: naama via Compfight cc


Could it be that the reason that you are miserable and restless is because you do not know why you are here?  Is it possible that the reason for your restlessness, uneasiness, and insecurity is because you are shaky about the direction you are going?  Do you think the reason that you are moving robotically through life unfulfilled, unsatisfied and lackluster like is because you have wandered away from your first love?

OR are you painfully aware of the direction you going and you are not happy with it.

You see, you  were created for a purpose.

Maybe you should get back in touch with your first love?  You know The One who created you.  He says that if you call on Him, He will answer you and tell you great and awesome things that you do not know.  He says that He has plans to prosper you and give you a great future!

He’s just a conversation away!

Until Next Time,

Peace and Joy!

The Eyes of Faith!

Half Empty or Half Full?

Half Empty or Half Full?


Today, I saw a little vision of seeing things from the eyes of Faith.  I saw my situation from HIS vantage point!  And boy, what a vision!  Suddenly, I became thankfull – no typo – THANKFULL!!


You see, it’s very easy to look at what you don’t have, but TODAY focus on things from what you DO have!


Quickly…..think (write down is best) 3 things you are thankfull for and think about these 3 things all day!  At the end of the day, consiously think (or write) how you feel and what you think happened as a result of your different vantage point.


There is something about Hope that enegerizes you.  It motivates you.  It uplifts you!


Peace and Joy!

The Enjoli Woman!

Help Grow Women!

The following is a question that was emailed to me.

As a young mother and wife I often find it difficult managing my own ambitions with the needs of my family. It seems my needs get put on the back burner so often that I’m afraid I’ll just forget them one day. And it may be easier to do just that, but I don’t want to. How can I achieve balance with my own self and the precious role God has given me as a wife and mother?

That is a common dilemma that lots of working women have these days.  This is especially true these days since women are supposed to be “Superhuman Women” and often feel guilty, shame, pressured, jealous, depressed or like a loser if you are not.

This myth was really glamorized in the 1980’s commercial for Enjoli which suggested that women are supposed to do it all.  Be it all.  And still have the energy to be sexy enough to seduce your husband at the end of the day.

Cute, but most of the time no cigars!

First thing that I think that you should do is realize that there is a time and a season for everything under the sun.  The second thing is to prioritize your life.  The third is to sit down with your beverage of choice and start to do some long term strategic planning for your life.

There is a Time and a Season

You mentioned you are a young mother.  That likely means you have small children or at least one.  Realize that although it seems like eternity – children REALLY do grow up fast.  Settle in your heart and position the thoughts that you are going to enjoy every moment in this time in your life.  That doesn’t mean that every moment will be enjoyable.  What it does mean is that by choice you will live in the here and now.  After all, that is really all the time we have.  There are many benefits to thinking like this.  One major one is perspective.  I’m thinking to myself….my firstborn is off to college in the fall….and it seems like yesterday he was 2 years old!

Prioritize Your Life

When you prioritize your life, it forces you to think about what is really important to you, how you want to live your life and helps you to evaluate whether or not your priorities are aligned.  Often, when I do this, what I “say” are my priorities and what I actually “do” in life are out of alignment.  Then I often tend to “rationalize” my behaviors which really is a form of lying to myself.  Some areas to think about are:

  1. Work
  2. Financial
  3. Relationship Intimate Relationship
  4. Home & Family
  5. Physical Health
  6. Mental
  7. Social
  8. Emotional
  9. Spiritual
  10. Character
  11. Contribution
  12. Fun & Adventure

Plan Your Future

When most people hear the term “strategic planning” they think that it is a business term.  It is.  But, what about the business of YOUR LIFE???!!!!  Just as it is effective in business, it is just as effective and even perhaps more important for YOU to do it for your life!  When you write things down, from your heart, it is often the dreams, goals and desires that are soul deep.  When you write them down, you proclaim them and they become a part of your subconscious.  You often get there, however, putting them down is one step.  Adding a timeline puts pressure on those desires to actually achieve them.

If you need a framework for doing so, you can go HERE to Michael Hyatt’s Life Plan which helps you to get from where you are now to where you want to be or HERE to Tom and Pam Wolf’s Identity and Destiny which helps you discern God’s plan for your life.

What do you think?  Do you already plan your life?  Do you write out your goals?  If so, why.  If not, why?  If you are committing now, feel free to share why you’ve decided to do so at this time.

Until Next Time,

Peace & Joy!



Resistance is GOOD!

When most people think of resistance, they commonly associate it with something unpleasant or bad.  But, when we think about caterpillars and butterflies, we associate that as being good.

Let’s look at the process.  The caterpillar secretes liquid from a gland below its mouth.  The liquid hardens.  Next, the caterpillar spins a silky thread around its body forming a covering covering or cocoon.

This outside hardens forming a chrysalis.  Inside the cocoon the caterpillar changes into a pupa.  The caterpillar then eats itself from the inside causing its body to die.  Some of the old tissues are then used to ultimately create a new body.

Once the pupa is fully grown inside the cocoon – the butterfly is ready to emerge.  It pushes.  It pulls.  It wiggles until finally it is FREE!  This can take anywhere from 10 days to several months.

If the pupa is disturbed in any way or helped – it doesn’t fully develop.  It will be weak in that area.  Left alone, though, in that process of struggle the butterfly is vibrant, beautiful and strong.  Able to survive the outside world.

You are beautiful!   digital cat 

You see, that resistance, that struggle was/is necessary.  If not, you won’t be/aren’t fully prepared for what lies ahead.  Think of it differently.  When you think of it differently you will begin to act differently.  You will see it as an opportunity to grow instead of drudgery or depression.  You might even expect or welcome it because you know that you have some big dreams inside of you.  And you know that you are going to need far more strength that you presently have in order to see them through.

So go ahead butterfly (in the making).  Hold your head up.  Continue in your process.  Whatever you do.  Just.  Keep.  Moving.  Forward!

Until Next Time,

Peace & Joy!




Come on in!  I am very excited that you decided to stop by.

Friends Are Always Welcome

I started this blog because I believe that it is a part of my life’s calling.  It seems that everything that has happened to me up until this point has prepared me for this.  I want to share my knowledge, experience and understanding to help women.  I believe that the best life that you can live involves sharing and helping others.  It’s also the most fun!

This blog is about just what the title states.  Grow Women!  Of course, women are multi-faceted, but I intend to write about women who have these deep desires to start something….. Anything!  They have these desires, but they have many obstacles or stuff in their lives, their minds, their hearts that are stopping them.  This blog is about helping you unstop WHATEVER is stopping you so that you can achieve your goals, gain clarity and tackle life’s obstacles.

The overall goal is offer confidence and hope!

I invite you to share your thoughts and comments.  Your hopes.  Your dreams.  Your set backs.  Your disappointments.  Your challenges.  Your victories!

Hold on  you CAN make it and your CAN do it! Grow Women will be here supporting you to do just that!

Until Next Time,

Peace & Joy!!